Tradition Be Damned: These Christmas Treats Are Way Beyond Their Best-Before Dates (CBC Comedy)

In 2022, I had an idea that had been rattling around in my head for a while. It started with my intense dislike of Christmas cake and spread to some of the other so-called treats that have become tradition at holiday time. However, many of these things date back hundreds of years, before we had things like, oh, say — sugar. So I decided it would be funny to make that point.

I knew people would have their opinions and traditions, but I wasn’t expecting it to blow up the way it did. The article went nationally viral and I ended up doing some national radio and other promotional bits. People either agreed with me (or at least saw the satire and humour of it) — or they got incredibly angry at me for having a stupid, (un)funny opinion.

Seriously, the comments section is funnier than the article itself. People claiming I have some sort of anti-European agenda (wtf?), saying mean things about my Mom (for the record, her baking is amazing) and admonishing me for telling people how to think — as they’re telling me how to think. I even got private emails threatening me. Who makes death threats over mincemeat?

My mom was actually quite bothered by all this, but I told her every weirdo trying to hurt me with words or threats are just more engagement for the article. I feel like Emperor Palpatine from Star Wars, their hate boosting my article. “Yessss…use your hate…good…”.

Anyway, follow the link to read the article. And for Santa’s sake, have fun with it. Disagree if you want, but realize that it’s comedy and it’s one dummy’s opinion.

(And yes, I know the difference between Christmas cake and pudding, etc — I just don’t give a shit enough to waste word count on the distinction).

Craig Silliphant

Craig Silliphant is a D-level celebrity with delusions of grandeur. A writer, editor, critic, creative director, broadcaster, and occasional filmmaker, his thoughts have appeared on radio, television, in print, and on the web. He is a juror on the Polaris Music Prize and the Juno Awards. He has written two books; a non-fiction book about Saskatoon's music scene, Exile Off Main St, and a book of short stories called Nothing You Do Matters. He's a husband and father who loves living in Saskatoon. He has horrible night terrors and apocalyptic dreams.

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